How to Conquer Life, Pre-Fulbright

I was going to write about how not to pack, but this title was far too tempting to pass up.

Ahem.

1. Do ridiculous pilates exercises in the living room until your father shuffles out in embarrassment for you. You’re doing it right.

Face it, I’m fabulous. (image via NPR)

2. Gourge youself on all things chocolate, fattening, fried, carbonated and caffeinated. Life is too short for diets and low cholesterol. Chocolate for breakfast. With bacon.

1836857_10203605592676304_1548004245485584465_oThis is my hangry face.

3. Pay an inordinate amount of money for dance classes. Realize you do not have the time or motivation for said dance classes. Try anyways. Realize you are a talentless blob with stilts for legs. Rejoice that you are, incrementally, getting better anyways. Hey, at least you’re working off the chocolate.

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Maybe if I close my eyes and think real hard, I’ll become a flapper. Or a lindy super star. Both are acceptable.

4. Write too many blogs. Feel too much. Realize that college life is over and post-college life is all about your lunch hour and your precious off time.

5. Signing up for ALL the Yelp Elite events. Aw yeah. Then, realize you still need to withdraw money for tips. Le sigh.

http://www.yelp.com/events/chicago-yelps-summer-of-sushi

6. Perfect your foreign accents. Because, while being PC is great and all these days, you can get away with a lot of things as a minority. Kind of. Not really at all. But here’s your chance to spite them! Confuse them with your British/Irish/Austrailian/Indian/Spanish accent to no end. It will challenge their stereotypes and broaden their horizons, all the while as you say “Good Eye Might” and “Razor Blades” in a pseudo-Aussie voice. Try ordering things, it’s the best.

179429_10152798857750788_872339261_n

I do what I want.

7. Cry over your two degrees. No, just kidding. Wait until the slowness that was your university actually delivers your degrees.

8. Realize it could be worse.

9. Have such crazy dreams you think you live in one of the Inception realities.

10. Pine for a holiday.

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All I do is win, man.

Alright, all jokes aside, I am so ready for Fulbright. I’ve filled out all the paper work, I’m still waiting for my college to send them my proof of graduation, and I’ve done absolutely 0 packing. Which is okay, given that I still have a month. I’m still wondering if I should get my International Motorcycle/Scooter License before I head out, or if I want to take it with everyone else. Meh. Thoughts on clothing? I’ll probably need to by more summer-y things. God knows that they don’t service my size shorts abroad.

I’ll probably be applying for grad school, though I’m not sure how that will go. We shall see.

Excited for traveling, new photo adventures and teaching! Not to mention the awesome food. Night markets, local fruit stands, fancy schmancy restaurants, noodles, dumplings…yesssss.

Alright.

Packing list and other fund things to come.

Ayo ayo ayo ayo…

Chimishurri out.

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